For many younger Canadians, homeownership has started to feel like a moving target. This is why buying a home with family members is becoming a much more common path. In the big cities, especially, prices have run ahead of incomes, so saving for a down payment is tough. Many first-time buyers lean on family to make it possible. Recent data from Statistics Canada shows that adult children whose parents own a home are about twice as likely to be homeowners themselves, and nearly one-third of first-time buyers now get financial help from family, with average gifts in the six figures.
Why It’s Getting Harder for Young Canadians to Buy on Their Own
- Prices outran paycheques. In cities like Vancouver, Toronto, and Montreal, home prices have climbed much faster than incomes, making it incredibly tough for first-time buyers to get in.
- Rent eats into the down payment. A lot of younger Canadians are putting more than a third of their income toward rent, which makes it really hard to build up any kind of serious savings.
- Parental ownership really matters. If your parents own property, your odds of owning one yourself go way up, especially if they own more than one home.
- Family gifts are becoming normal. More first-time buyers are getting financial help from parents or relatives, often supported by a simple gift letter for a down payment for their lender, and those gifts are often large enough to make or break a deal.
- More young adults are living at home. A growing number of Canadians in their 20s and early 30s are staying with their parents longer so they can save and avoid sky-high rent.
Put together, these point in the same direction: for many young Canadians, buying a home with family is becoming the most realistic path to homeownership. The real trick is doing it in a way that does not create resentment, awkward conversations, or long-term family tension.
Keeping the Peace When Family Money Is Involved
Clarifying Gift or Loan
When you are buying a home with family help, the fastest way to strain the relationship is to leave the money vague. Before you start house hunting, talk with your parents or relatives about what their support actually is: a gift, a loan, or an investment where they go on title. If it is a loan, agree in writing on how much you will repay, when payments start, and what happens if your income drops for a while. If it is a gift, be clear that you appreciate it and value their input, but day-to-day decisions in the home are still yours. Your lender may also ask for a gift letter for down payment to confirm that the money does not need to be paid back, so it helps to have that conversation early. If the money is treated as an investment, talk through who gets a say in the big calls, such as renovations, renting out the property, refinancing, or selling. A short written agreement protects you just as much as it protects them, and keeps buying a home with family members from turning into a long-running source of stress and second-guessing.
Deciding Who Is in Charge
When you are buying a home with family, control can quietly become an issue. A parent might start treating the place like their own, or you might forget that someone else has real money tied up in your home. To keep things healthy, talk about which decisions are yours alone and which ones you will share. Everyday choices like decor, guests, and how you use the rooms usually belong to you as the person living there. Bigger financial moves, such as selling, taking on a new line of credit, or turning the property into a full-time rental, may be joint decisions if family money is involved. A simple yearly check-in on the mortgage, repairs, and future plans can help everyone feel informed without hovering over each other. When you set these expectations early, it is much easier to accept help without feeling like buying a home with family means giving up control of your life.
Managing Support Among Siblings
If your parents help you more than your siblings, it can create tension, even if no one says anything out loud. As the person receiving help, you can lower the temperature by acknowledging that support will not look the same for everyone. You might get help with a down payment, while a brother or sister gets support for grad school, a business idea, or future caregiving costs. When you treat it as part of a bigger picture instead of a one-time win, it is easier for others to see it that way too.
If your parents signed a down payment gift letter for you, that document shows clearly what you received for your home purchase. You can encourage your family to keep simple notes on other major gifts and loans so that, later on, no one is relying on fuzzy memories. Being open about the fact that your parents helped, and that there is a broader plan for supporting everyone over time, usually protects relationships better than hoping no one notices.
Protecting Parents’ Retirement
Part of buying a home with family help is caring about your parents’ future as much as your own. You can encourage them to look at their retirement numbers and decide how much they can safely give or lend without putting pressure on their later years. That might mean they give less than you hoped, or structure it as a small loan instead of a big gift, but it also means you are not building your future on money they cannot afford to lose. If they decide to give you funds for your down payment, a down payment gift letter can also make it clear to everyone that this money is a true gift, not something they are counting on getting back. Flexible options, like a modest loan from a home equity line of credit, can sometimes meet in the middle.
You can also talk in advance about what happens if they hit a rough patch. Would you be willing to refinance, adjust your payments, or even sell if it meant they did not have to cut essential expenses? Asking those questions now shows that you see this as a shared plan, not just a boost for yourself. It also takes the pressure off them to bring it up later when it may already feel emotional.
Setting Up Ownership and Exit Plans
Even when everyone feels good about the plan, the legal setup still matters. As the buyer, you need to be clear on how your parents’ help actually shows up on paper. Are they giving you the down payment, cosigning the mortgage, going on title as co-owners, or lending you money through a second mortgage? Each option changes who is on the hook for the mortgage, who owns what share of the home, and how easy it will be to change things later if you need to.
Once you know how they are helping, it is worth talking about how things could end or shift over time. You might be fine today, but what if you split up with a partner, need to move for work, or want to buy your parents out in a few years? A simple exit plan should cover when the home can be sold, how you will agree on a price, who gets first chance to buy the other out, and what happens if someone cannot keep up with their share of the costs. Thinking through those “what ifs” while everyone is getting along is much easier than scrambling during a crisis, and it gives you a clear way to protect both your home and your relationships if life changes.
Buying your first place can feel like a lot to take on, especially with family involved, but you do not have to sort it out alone. A REMAX agent can walk you through financing options, family support, and neighbourhood choices so you can make informed decisions
